So That’s How It’s Gonna Be
By Sabrina McDonald
In my home, communication is exhausting.
My kids want every last detail—1,000 questions worth. Who, what, when, where, why, and how are never enough.
Not so with my husband. If I tell him who, what, when, where, why, and how, that’s too much information (and annoying). It’s no wonder some people just remain silent.
But not me. I’m a glutton for punishment.
Take the other day, when my tire blew out on the highway. Thankfully, my handy husband was there. Looking in the rearview mirror, I could almost see his hero’s cape flapping in the breeze of every high-speed vehicle.
While he mounted the spare, I called about our warranty. But first, I needed some information from him. Too much information, apparently, because he snapped at me. And just like that he went from my hero to a rival of war.
So that’s how it’s gonna be.
When he hopped back in the car, my eyes were fixed in a hypnotic rage. As we drove, I realized silence wouldn’t help. But more words would only make it worse.
And what could he really do, anyway? What’s done is done.
Silence and nagging are two sides of the same coin. Both useless. But I had one more option: Let it go.
There is a little-known secret to successful relationships, and here it is: thick skin. If you’re going to play the game of marriage, you’ve got to develop some callouses.
Colossians 3:13 (NIV) says, “Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.” Jesus doesn’t give me the silent treatment or beat me with His tongue when I sin. He simply forgives.
That day, I chose to chalk the whole situation up to plain ol’ miscommunication. We have that sometimes. We’re not perfect. And that’s OK.
The good stuff: I ... urge you to walk in a manner worthy of the calling to which you have been called, with all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love. (Ephesians 4:1-2)
- Are you holding on to grievances that need to be let go? Write them down and burn the papers in the fireplace.
- Read scriptures about being patient with others.
- Talk to your spouse about a recent miscommunication you are having a hard time getting past.
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